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An Eggish WMD

Posted on February 4, 2008 By The Mascot 8 Comments on An Eggish WMD
In the News

Tacticus Maximus brought this story to my attention earlier today, about some dude who used a plastic egg as part of a WMD.

While I will not give my personal opinion on the situation, the good people of EETE posted an official release on their website today in the “News” section of eetecares.org.

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8 thoughts on “An Eggish WMD”

  1. Wahrheit says:
    February 5, 2008 at 1:13 am

    Two things–

    1) The EETE site is AWESOME, you, Mascot, never looked better than in your plush office, and that working out has got you ripped.

    2) Charging the dude with “Weapons of mass destruction” is just beyond the ridiculous and into the sublime. Plastic air gun pellets caused “alarm.” LMAO! He’s obviously an idiot who should get a little time, but JEEBUS the thing wasn’t filled with mustard gas or anthrax! I also read something today about a school charging two girls with “rioting” for a French fry fight…Oh, the humanity…

    Reply
  2. Tacticus Maximus says:
    February 5, 2008 at 5:19 am

    A scandal brewing? Is not this photo inappropriate for the President of EETE?

    @Warheit: I suppose if they had used “Freedom Fries” instead of “French Fries” they would have been freedom fighters ?

    Reply
  3. Allen says:
    February 5, 2008 at 9:08 am

    There’s an html tag showing in the upper left corner of EETE.

    By the way, the mascot doesn’t have a real name? I mean for this site, I understand him being called the Mascot… but on a spinoff site like EETE where he’s a president of something… shouldn’t he have a name?

    Reply
  4. Donnie says:
    February 5, 2008 at 1:46 pm

    @Wahrheit: What, you don’t think the guy should go to Guantanamo?

    What’s defined “mass” destruction is an interesting question. It is number of people? A revolver could take out 6 people. Does that count?

    @Tacticus: He’ll argue that the picture was Photoshopped.

    @Allen: I don’t know his real name and he refuses to publicly divulge it. The excuse is that his name is unpronounceable by humans, only other eggs. Replace “egg” with “dragon”, and you find a line that’s in half of all fantasy novels.

    Reply
  5. gorckat says:
    February 5, 2008 at 8:56 pm

    Oh, cool! I found a device that can be used to probe eggs to determine if they’re dangerous:

    http://www.kitchenfantasy.com/images/989.jpg

    Reply
  6. The Mascot says:
    February 5, 2008 at 10:42 pm

    Wahrheit: Finally, you are someone who gives me the props I deserve. Don’t think I don’t appreciate it, even though I could simply feel entitled to it! Don’t worry, I still have that ambassadorship lined up for you when I become president. And you’ll be pleasantly surprised by the next great moments in history.

    Tacticus–that picture is Photoshopped. Again, the Bush administration is trying everything possible to smear its opponents!

    Allen–only eggs have the proper vocal chords to pronounce my name. So I gave myself a human name to make things easier on you.

    Gorckat–this is exactly the type of thing EETE is fighting against! Can I count on a $50 donation in the name of mercy?

    Reply
  7. Allen says:
    February 6, 2008 at 9:36 am

    Of all the human names to choose, why mascot? Your poor selection in a name has left you confined to your job at LEP. It’d be like choosing the name Jeeves and wondering why you’re always a butler.

    Reply
  8. The Mascot says:
    February 6, 2008 at 12:39 pm

    What do you mean? When some professional sports team wants to change their mascot, who do you think they’re going to ask first? Besides, being a mascot has its advantages. Like you can randomly hug cute chicks and no one’s going to freak out. But you have to touch some men, too, so no one gets suspicious.

    Reply

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