In short, I am alive, but very busy and tired. Even on weekends. Will respond to your witty and enlightening comments later.
Feel free to submit your bad puns in the comments! Here’s mine: I don’t get along with Moroccans. We just don’t see fez to fez.
A group of friars plan on raising money by selling flowers. The florists did not like this because it will undercut their business. They sent the town bully named Hugh to stop the friars. It just shows that Hugh and only Hugh can prevent florist friars 🙂
That is one of my favorite bad puns, by the way.
We’re spozed to be witty and enlightening?
Me think we smart 🙂
The mathematician and philosopher Rene Descartes was also an accomplished equestrian. However, he was known for going through grooms very quickly, due to being hard to please. He interviewed one young man for the position and liked him well enough, so he hired the young man. On the new groom’s very first day of employment, he helped Descartes dress first, and then got his horse readied and out of the stable for Descartes to ride.
After Descartes came back from his ride, he handed the reins to the new groom and said, “Curry the horse. By the way, you’re fired.” He then stalked off.
The new groom was puzzled and hurt to be fired on his first day. “What did I do wrong?” he asked the butler, who was standing nearby. The butler sighed.
“It was the order in which you did everything. You’re not supposed to put Descartes before the horse.”
TL;DR
Jerk 🙁
GROAN! 🙂 Some ignorant people would think that Descarted was pronouned dez-car-teez. That’s what i thought when i took philosophy 101.
Ah, I’ve only ever heard it mispronounced as “Dess-carts.”
Recently, a Mexican fireman had twin boys,
He decided to name them Hose A and Hose B.
What do you call a Japanese man who is high on LSD?
A UFO–Unidentified Frying Object.
Confucius say man who walk sideways in Thailand airport Bangkok?
that’s almost as bad as the chinese couple who named their kid by throwing silverware on the floor…
You know, I honestly don’t think I’ve ever heard that joke. Or if I have, I’ve forgotten it.
Another bad pun story:
Mahatma Gandhi always walked barefoot and ultimately the soles of his feet became thick and very hard. He also was, of course, known to be a man of deep spiritual conviction. He undertook hunger strikes as a political protest and at times was both thin and frail. Furthermore, due to his weird diet, he suffered from bad breath. VERY bad breath.
In fact, in time he came to be known as “a super-callused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis.”
Oh, and meant to add: It was not my intention to be offensive, my bad 🙁
… I do believe that is the best bad pun I have ever heard. Sincerely, it is. and I thought the entire purpose of this thread was to offend in the name of entertainment. wasn’t there a series on quaddafi fried chicken a little while ago? thinned skinners need not apply to be a LEPer!
I’m Indian and i’m deeply offended…oh who am i kidding. I’m trying to make a witty response with an epic fail 🙂
If you were Indian and offended, would that make you an offindian? Haha, tip your waitress, I’ll be here all week!
You people are completely awesome. And I mean that in the most sincerest sense.
Granted, Katrushka’s slightly more awesome than the rest of you for obvious reasons. Nothing personal 😀
It’s because I posted the most bad puns.
no, it’s because you have the best shoes.