You think that clip art of a radio tower is crappy? Check out some of the radio ads we Miamians have to endure:
Headquarter Toyota: “You’ll feel like you bought from the factory!” That’s one way of warning their customers how dirty their showroom is. At least they’re not ashamed of it.
Some Other Random Car Dealership: “We accept all credit applications.” Well, that’s just swell. If they said they’d finance everyone regardless of credit, that might be something. All these guys really guarantee is that they’ll take 20 seconds to skim over Random Guy’s credit app (and only afterwards laugh in his face).
Since when did we live in the year 12X6?: Hearing a fishing store advertising compound bows was slightly jarring, and I wondered why 13th century bows would appeal to the fishing crowd. (I had confused them with composite bows, which were so effectively used by the armies of Genghis Khan. Compound bows were invented in the sixties and are used for hunting.)
Corona Beer: “Official Sponsor of the Timeout.” They spout consistently lame-o stories about how sports employees decided to drink Corona instead of doing their jobs. I feel sorry for Corona having to shell out money for a radio campaign guaranteed to drive people away from their product. Unless, of course, they created the ads in-house, in which case the perpetrators deserve the Howard C. Forman treatment.
Beverly’s Jewelers: Miami is the third poorest major city in the US. We don’t need to hear about jewelry that’s on sale for “only $3,495”.