I’m the creator of the Liquid Egg Product blog, and do 98% of the work around here. Liquid Egg Product is a personal blog with marginal entertainment value. It embodies the spirit of mediocrity itself, much like I’ve been so successful at doing.
The Liquid Egg Product Mascot
He’s that egg you see at the top of the page, usually called “the Mascot” for short. He likes to dub himself Liquid E. P. Mascot for some reason (I think he wants to get in good graces with Helen A. S. Popkin). If I’m particularly displeased with him, I’ll refer to him as “the Egg” or “that Egg”.
For some reason, he thinks he can become rich and famous off by exposure on this website.
He’s arrogant and horny, considers himself a lady killer, and has no consideration for others. Plus he tried to assassinate me once. Besides that, he’s a pretty cool guy to hang with.
Mr. E is a good egg with a great attitude. He’s pretty famous; you’ve probably heard of him–he’s got gold chains, a mohawk, and used to star on the “E-Team” TV program.
Nowadays, he’s more content to be in the background as an inspirational figure–he’s already had his day in the spotlight.
Egg Fu Yung
Originally from China, Egg Fu Yung was so impressed by the Liquid Egg Product website, he decided to come to the States and be an intern.
He’s good at math, practices kung fu, is a horrible driver, and eats weird animal parts. But he doesn’t wear glasses so that he won’t be seen as just another Chinese stereotype.
No eggs were harmed in the making of this website. Except for the Mascot, because he deserves it.
I’m aware “uncomfortability” is not a real word.
None of the posts were created under the influence of drugs or alcohol.
Only one of the posts was inspired while under the influence of stinky tofu.
If you’re looking for discussions about practical, relevant topics, you’re in the wrong place, friend.
The “Grilled Cheese” category has nothing to do with the sandwich. Those are for posts which talk about some boring aspect of my personal life.